Tuesday, February 26, 2008

lil Baby Frank and the Butterknife



In my dreams...last night.

I was carjacked by a fat, short mexican. He pulled a butter knife on me. In the dream it was funny but really dangerous too.
So I crashed my car into a tree and leaned on the horn (thanks Oprah!)
Lots of old men came to save me.

Skip ahead (or backwards...I can never remember the order of my dreams)...I'm in an orphanage surrounded by nuns and babies. Such cute little guys in old fashioned pajamas. One of the nuns orders me to feed Frank Sinatra. Sure enough, there's baby Sinatra. He was cute and had these really pronounced dimples.
I was rocking him to sleep in my arms and he went for the boob (newborns go to ANY boob they can find and try to suckle. It's the truth. I'm not creepy, I swear)...And I was like, "NOOO baby Frank, you're a silly little guy. You need a baba." The nuns got really pissed and threw him into his crib. Threw him hard.

:-/

So in conclusion, I think I need to not only have a baby very soon, but remain vigilant when locking my doors as soon as I get in the car.

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